Saturday, September 25, 2010

Not Paying Enough Attention

I found out recently that a friend of mine is in trouble.  It was one of those face/palm moments.  Once I knew it, I could see the warning signs in the past few months flashing out at me like they were limned in neon, and I wanted to pound my head on the nearest hard, flat surface for being an oblivious idiot.  How is it that this friend was going through this thing, and I didn't know it?

I can make excuses.  I can tell you that life for me lately has been a delicate highwire act composed of equal parts of hysteria and furious motion.  I could mention that I have, in many ways, created a shell of blindness to enshroud myself so I don't see some of the things that are upsetting me most in my day-to-day world. 

Really, though, I can't feel that there is any excuse.  I don't know that there is a single thing I could have done for my friend or even can do now, but I should at least have seen. The not-seeing, the closing my eyes, is unforgivable.  I've got my eyes squeezed so tightly shut in self-defense that I'm missing important things.  It's got to change.

No comments:

Post a Comment

And then you said.....