The wanderlust is so strong in me today that I could throw a change of clothes and the rudimentary toiletries in a bag, point the PT Cruiser in a random direction, and drive until I found something...else. It's a strange restlessness that crops up in me every so often, a need to see something new, a change of scenery, a change of mind.
Podunk is starting to close in on me, and there's no hope of escape this summer. I am way too broke to go anywhere or do anything other than take mental vacations, so I keep having to pretend I don't notice the fact that that the walls are getting closer together, that the "sameness" of Podunk that I normally find so comforting and charming is becoming almost painful. I don't need a jumbo jet to another country, although that would be nice. I just need to get out of here for a few days, to see something that's not here. I got out my Mississippi: Off the Beaten Path guidebook two days ago when this nagging little ache began, and I found the perfect place to go, but since all my friends were eaten by their children and I'm flat-broke, I have no one to go with and no money to use, anyway. I wish I had somebody to travel with, somebody who enjoyed going and doing.
It's not that I hate living here. I love Podunk, otherwise I never would have come back home. Coming back was a choice I made, and I knew when I did it that there would be times like this, times when I'd miss the other life I had. I knew I was sort of giving up my wings to come back home. Sometimes, though, especially in the summer, I miss them so much it hurts. I guess it's because I'm not busy, so I actually have the time to think about it.
I'll find a way to break out of this, I guess, and everything will go back to normal, but for now, I so wish I could just get away from here for awhile.
I understand this feeling all too well.
ReplyDeleteBut...I wanted to tell you about a film I just enjoyed (you may have seen it as it is right up your alley) I received it from Netflix - it may be hard to find in a video store.
Two Soldiers, a 40 minute film (won an Oscar) based on the Faulkner story. I thought it was excellent - beautifully filmed, the acting quite special. The 8 year old boy stole my heart in two seconds.
Tell me what you think of the setting. It is supposed to be Jefferson (Oxford) but it was filmed in North Carolina and they used Winston Salem to be Memphis. I didn't think it looked right, not like the Mississippi I remember.
I've spent much time on the Delta (near Greenville) and the backwaters around Moss Point and Pascagoula plus central state areas like Cooperville and Crystal Springs. I don't think Yadkinville NC looks like north central Mississippi, but I may have forgotten the reality. I remember mostly the whimpering heat and the mosquitos of the Delta in August.
And I remember the weirdest things about Moss Point. Where my grandparents lived, there was the oddest smell, kind of like trapped crustaceans and the water (from the spigot) was so soft, almost velvety.
It won't serve as a get away, but i did watch the film 3 times. It was that good.