At first I was incredulous. Then I was appalled. Then I just started laughing.
I was listening to a new compilation of Christmas songs from various artists. On it was the song (and I couldn't make this up if I tried) "Shimmy Down My Chimney (Fill Up My Stocking)" by Alison Krauss.
I have no idea how Alison Krauss wound up singing this song. It's nothing like what I am used to hearing from her. She has a lovely voice, sweet and rich. Usually, the songs she sings are delicate and thoughtful. This one? Yeah. Not so much.
Here are some of the tasteful lyrics:
I'm not asking for a miracle, just a night
And if you just look in my eyes, you just might
There'll be no other woman who'll treat you like I can
(Come on over here)
I'll be your loving, darling, you'll be my loving man
Oh, I watch you shimmy down the chimney, baby
I watch you fill up my stocking
But when I offer you some Christmas greetings
You just keep on walking
Who doesn't love a Christmas innuendo? (Oh, you, too?)
It's just horrible. Previously, my least-favorite Christmas song was the emotional torture-tool "The Christmas Shoes." At least there was an attempt at sweetness in that. Granted it is the kind of sweetness that causes "diabeetus," but it has some trace of Christmas in it. I'm having a hard time getting to the spirit of the season with "Shimmy Down My Chimney." (God. I feel absurd just typing the name.)
I would tell you to check it out if you haven't heard it, but I really don't think I feel much like inflicting it on anybody else. I guess if you're curious, have at it. If not, by all means, just take my word for it and stay well clear.
No comments:
Post a Comment
And then you said.....